


Dork (Affectionate)

by Dresupi



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Awesome Darcy Lewis, Best Man Spencer Reid, Demisexual Darcy Lewis, Demisexual Spencer Reid, Demisexuality, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Getting to Know Each Other, Inspired by Music, Maid of Honor Darcy Lewis, Matchmaker Penelope Garcia, Matchmaking, Minor Penelope Garcia/Derek Morgan, POV Darcy Lewis, Pre-Relationship, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:34:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28581318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dresupi/pseuds/Dresupi
Summary: Darcy's not the dating kind. Not because she doesn't want to be, but because most people don't want to wait around for her to catch up.Enter: Penelope and her Glorious Matchmaking PowersIf nothing else came of this weekend, let it be known, Penelope Garcia-Morgan was an absolute genius.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Spencer Reid
Comments: 21
Kudos: 177
Collections: Darcy Lewis Bingo





	Dork (Affectionate)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ibelieveinturtles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ibelieveinturtles/gifts).



> Special thanks to thestanceyg for betaing this monster!
> 
> This is for **Darcy Lewis Bingo, square D-3 Wedding**
> 
> This is also part of my Song Prompts 2020-21 series
> 
> I Don't Feel Like Dancing - Scissor Sisters

“I know, ladies, I know…” Darcy scratched behind both Cordelia and Agnes’s ears. “I’ll be back for you in four days. Promise.”

Cordelia, the afghan-collie mix and the larger of the two dogs looked like she was torn between ear scritches from her favorite human and running around in the yard outside the kennel.

Agnes, the spaniel mix, however, seemed to be trying to prolong said ear scritches so Darcy wouldn’t leave. But she was going to miss her flight if she stayed too much longer. She still had to drive to the airport.

After one last scratch and kisses for both of them, Darcy waved to them as they were led into the back of the kennel, signed some drop off paperwork, and hurried out to the car.

She had a few Xanax in her purse for the flight, but she was worried that even if she took one upon arriving at the airport, that it wouldn’t kick in by take off, which was the whole reason she wanted it anyway. She was fine once the plane got in the air, but taking off always made her nervous. And this was going to be one of those small planes too. There were less than fifty seats on it or something. The flight was only like three hours. It might not be worth it to drug herself. Maybe she could read a book or something.

As much as she hated flying, Darcy was very excited about Penelope’s wedding.

Derek was a really awesome guy, and she’d enjoyed one-hundred percent of the times she’d gone over to their home for dinner or movie nights, or just to flat out hang out with her favorite cousin. Penelope was awesome. Not technically her cousin, but it was easier to explain than the reality. That Darcy had been in the system since she was fourteen and Penelope had been the big sister she and her brother Bennet never had.

Life after Mom died hadn’t always been a walk in the park, but the days where Penelope had visited had left lasting loving impressions in her mind. And even though Pen was only a couple of years older than her, and she’d only been doing it for community service or whatever, it didn’t matter. Darcy loved hanging out with her.

So when Pen asked her to be her maid of honor, she of course said yes. And Penelope being Penelope, had asked Darcy in a way that was likely more over-the-top than Derek’s actual-facts proposal had been.

She’d put it in fortune cookies they’d made from scratch, hiding the fortune in a special chocolate dipped one, and Darcy, like a dunce, had saved it for last and finally started breaking it open towards the end of the movie night. They were watching her favorite, The Princess Bride. She really should have seen it coming. Penelope was doing all of her favorite things.

When the handwritten note fell open on her lap, Darcy picked it up, expecting to see something snarky like the others had been. But this one simply said. “I love you like a sister, be my maid of honor?”

Darcy screeched and Penelope screeched and then Penelope had called Derek to let him know the good news. And that’s when he informed Penelope that he’d asked their friend Spencer to be his best man, and Penelope got this devious look in her eye.

Darcy was well acquainted with that look.

It had resulted in a handful of dates over the years. Not bad ones. Pen had great taste. And she was well aware of Darcy’s penchant for getting to know someone first. It was more than a penchant, it was an orientation, but Darcy had only just recently learned that there was a word for it.

Demisexual.

She liked it. It was sort of cute. Like a demi plié in ballet.

It hadn’t always been an easy thing to be. Especially when she hadn’t even known there was a name for it. It sort of muddled things in her dating life. Especially when nobody seemed to understand that she had to have like… pre-dates before the real dates to see if she could even date the person.

So it was difficult to set her up with people, to say the least.

But Penelope wasn’t one to back down from a challenge. She started talking up Dr. Spencer Reid that day. To the point where Darcy wasn’t sure the guy even existed. He sounded like the type of man that someone would catfish her with. But Penelope wasn’t cruel. She didn’t have a mean bone in her body. So Darcy let it happen. The worst thing he could say was that he wasn’t interested, right?

And if it made Penelope happy during the days before her wedding, then woe be it for Darcy to keep her from it.

Speaking of the wedding, it was going to be an epic gala event of an event because it was Penelope. And Derek loved his baby girl, so he was going to go ahead with whatever she wanted.

So that was how Darcy found herself sitting on an itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny, yellow-polka dot aircraft, directly beside the man who Penelope had dubbed “the one”.

Darcy had sniffed and said she’d thought Derek was the one.

Penelope glared. “ _Your_ one, doofus.”

“I don’t need a ‘ _one’_ , Pen. I have you.”

“Nonsense. You need Spencer. _Believe me_.”

And Darcy had sighed and arrived at the airport when Penelope had instructed. She hadn’t left with Derek and Pen because they had some stuff they needed to take care of before everyone arrived, and Darcy had work.

But now she was here. At the airport and waiting with all the other people for a plane to board. There was a woman with a little boy, who Darcy was fairly certain was related to Derek. She had his cheekbones and eyes, but she didn’t want to be weird by asking.

There was an older couple who weren’t with the wedding party, they were just traveling to the island for the weekend on a whim.

And then there was _him_.

He was tall. Thin. Gangly. Floppy hair and shiny brown eyes. He had a very nice nose too. Not that Darcy went for noses, but his was particularly angular and pleasing to the eye. Every part of him was lovely, she wasn’t going to lie. But he hadn’t given her a second look.

Fortunately, Darcy couldn’t leave well enough alone.

“You must be Dr. Reid?” she began.

He turned slowly as if surprised to see someone who knew his name.

“Who wants to know?” he asked, completely straight-faced and Darcy almost laughed, but she didn’t.

“Oh, um… me, I guess. I’m Darcy Lewis. Penelope’s—“

“Maid of Honor…” He finished for her, albeit quietly, so he wasn’t trying to interrupt, likely just trying to mouth along or whatever.

“Ah. I see my reputation precedes me.”

“Sort of,” he said, laughing a little and reaching for the strap of his bag. Looked like a nervous twitch more than anything else, but that would be Darcy’s psychoanalyzing someone again. And she wasn’t even a doctor yet. She really had to stop doing that.

“Well, I’m going to assume you _are_ Dr. Reid…”

“You’d be correct in that assumption.”

“Cool,” she said, grinning. “Well, nice to meet you.”

“And you as well,” he offered.

Darcy stepped back a little, giving him an out, which he looked like he was taking.

Until he didn’t and stepped closer again. Not too close. Not aggressively so, but Darcy didn’t think this guy had an aggressive bone in his body.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course,” she said immediately. “I love questions.”

He smiled a little at that. “Asking or answering?”

“Both.”

“Good to know.”

“Was that the question?”

“No, I have another one.”

“Well, I mean, you only asked for ‘a’ question, so…”

He laughed. He had a great smile. “May I ask… up to three questions?”

“Absolutely. One.”

“Penelope says you’re her cousin. But not really. She was your Big Sister when you were in high school.”

“None of that was a question.”

“No, I just… you’ve known her for a long time.”

“Yes.”

“Why does she do the matchmaking thing?” he asked.

“Oh, that. She likes to see everyone happy. And if she thinks you’d be happy with someone, she’s gonna help you find that someone. But that’s not to say she tries to force things. My actual-facts twin brother is aro/ace, and all she does for him is buy him art supplies.”

“You have a twin?”

“Yes. And that’s three. You’ll have to resubmit if you’d like to ask me anything else.” She grinned and he mirrored her expression.

“Fine. Can I sit with you on the plane and ask you questions while we’re in flight?”

“Only if I can ask them as well.”

He pretended to think for a long moment before nodding. “Seems fair, yeah.”

“Okay then.” She tried to hide her grin as their gate opened.

He let her go ahead and she took her carry-on with her. She only had the carry-on, which was crammed full of clothing. Penelope had her bridesmaid’s dress. So Darcy only had to worry about her clothes for the next few days, plus her laptop just in case she could get some work done on her paper. But that was in her purse.

Spencer had a carry on as well, and a messenger bag that hit his hip as he walked behind her.

She let the attendant show her to her seat, which, as luck would have it, was beside Spencer in the back of the plane.

Most of the other passengers were already in their seats.

It didn’t take long to get situated.

And before she knew it, they were taking off. Spencer still hadn’t spoken, and she was about to when they lifted off and he turned to her. “What’s your brother’s name?”

“Ben,” she said with a grin. “As in Bennet.”

“So your names are Bennet and Darcy?”

“Yep. My mom was an Austen Scholar.”

“But you said you were in the system.”

“Indeed I was. My mother passed away when I was fourteen.”

His brow knit slightly. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

She gave him the perfunctory flat-lipped smile that one always gave when confronted with the twelve-year-old death of one’s parent.

“My dad wasn’t ever…” She waved her hand. “But that’s not to say that I have daddy issues.”

“Now you’re just answering questions I haven’t asked,” he pointed out.

“True. So you got some freebies. My turn.”

The plane had leveled out by then and Darcy was pleasantly surprised that her panic reaction to taking off hadn’t kicked in the entire time she was speaking with Spencer, who was currently sitting back with his hands folded. “Shoot,” he said.

“Where’d you grow up?”

“Las Vegas, Nevada.”

“For real?”

“Yep. I can count cards and everything.”

Her eyes widened. “Wait, say what now?”

“That’s what Morgan told me it was. It’s apparently frowned upon, but it’s simple math, I mean…”

Darcy grinned. “Okay, so what about _your_ parents?”

“My mother has schizophrenia and is in assisted living due to early-onset dementia.”

“Oh…” Darcy’s eyes widened. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s fine. Not your fault. I just feel it’s best to get it out of the way early on.”

“Does it scare anyone off?” she asked.

“Like you wouldn’t believe. Are you scared?”

She laughed. “Nope. People with schizophrenia aren’t any more violent than anyone else. If anything, they’re less violent due to their brain chemistry.”

His eyebrows went up.

“Before you ask, I’m still asking you things.”

“I’ll remember it for later,” he promised.

“Fine, but what are your doctorates in?”

“Psychology, Sociology, Engineering, and mathematics.”

“Whoa…” she said, eyebrows raised. “And you’ve got like what… three years on me, and I don’t even have one?”

“I graduated from college at eleven.”

“Ah. Well. That answers that. You’ve had more time. Alright, so pastimes. Anything I should be warned about?”

“I enjoy reading and old foreign films with or without subtitles. I also enjoy Doctor Who.”

She grinned. “Who’s your Doctor?”

“Four.”

“Mine’s Nine.”

“Nine?” He pursed his lips. “That’s not a popular opinion.”

“I know, but Christopher Eccleston, man…” She shrugged. “What can I say, I have a thing for muppets.”

“You should like David Tennant more, then.”

“To be fair, I like him a fair amount, it’s just that Nine was my first Doctor, so he’s got a special place in my heart. What do you like to read?” she asked.

“Everything,” he replied, grinning a little.

“Oh?” She folded her hands on her knee. “Same.”

“Really?”

She squinted at him and nodded. “Fine, go ahead and ask me things now.”

“What’s your field of study?”

‘Psychiatry.”

He looked elated.

“You were sitting on that one,” she laughed.

“Yes. Due to your response to mental illness.”

She shrugged. “It shouldn’t be revolutionary to think of people as well… people.”

He sighed and nodded. “What’s your favorite Austen book?”

“Northanger Abbey.”

He smiled. “Why that one?”

“Because it’s got a true villain and it’s so extra and she based it on the gothic romance, so like, there’s this naivety that’s wonderful in a heroine. But also? Henry Tilney? _So_ dreamy.”

He smiled and looked down at his hands. “Okay, so now on to the real questions…”

“Pineapple on pizza?” they both asked unanimously.

She laughed. “Oh my god. Yes.”

“Yes for me too.”

* * *

After a purely wonderful, but altogether too short plane ride, they shared a cab from the airport to the hotel. She figured they’d be parting ways once they got their key cards to their rooms, but as luck would have it, Spencer waited back for her to get on the elevator with him.

And they stopped on the same floor. Which, that was fair. It was likely a block of rooms that had been put aside for the wedding party.

When they approached room doors with their names on them, she noted they were next door to each other.

“Oh. Neighbors,” she said, grinning. “Try not to keep me up all night with your raucous reading.”

He chuckled and pushed open the door to his room. She did the same and stepped inside.

The room was spacious. A nice big bathroom and a big king-sized bed. A TV on one wall and a gift basket on the end of the bed.

She checked it out, took an apple from the top of the basket, and went to wash it before biting down. As she did, she inspected all the doors in the room. Door number one was the water heater and air intake.

Door number two was a linen closet.

And door number three…

Opened right into Spencer’s room.

“Oh!” she said, eyes wide. “I’m so sorry, I thought this was a closet.

He smiled. “Nope, it’s me. Unless my room is actually the closet to your room, in which case…” he glanced around. “This is one hell of a closet.”

She laughed and backed into her room again. “Sorry again.’

“It’s no problem!” he called.

Darcy’s eyes widened as she went to sit down on the bed and text Penelope.

_D: “I cannot believe you put us in adjoining rooms. You hoe-bag.”_

_P: “I love you too, Darce. Isn’t he perfect?”_

_D: “Yes, but oh my god, Penelope.”_

Penelope just sent a series of smiley emojis. And then began typing again.

_P: “So you’re here? Want to come down and take a segway tour of the island with me and Derek? Spencer’s coming too.”_

_D: “Oh wow. What a crazy random happenstance.”_

_P: “Oh come on, Dr. Horrible. You know you love all this architecture crap. You probably know more than the tour guide.”_

_D: “Fine. But only because it’ll make me look awesome in front of Spencer.”_

_P: “Damn straight it will. He already texted Derek.”_

_D: “What’d he say?”_

Darcy sent the message quickly, grinning broadly and feeling like a teenager all at once.

_P: “Only that the flight was pleasant largely due to his seatmate. And that’s you!”_

_D: “That’s me!”_

Darcy’s cheeks hurt from grinning.

_P: “See you downstairs in ten?”_

_D: “Yep. I just need to change into shorts or something.”_

_P: “Show off them legs girl.”_

_D: “I love you, Penelope.”_

_P: “Love you too, Darce.”_

* * *

The architecture was beautiful. And Darcy did know more about it than the tour guide, which certainly took the starch out of his shirt. Especially since he started the tour trying to ask her out because she got there early and she was too nice to tell him that she was put off by the fact that he wore a crisp purple shirt and asked her out by Segwaying around her in circles and making her feel like prey being hunted in the lamest nature documentary of ever.

Luckily, the others arrived soon after and Spencer stuck close enough to her that the tour guide left her alone.

Or again, it might have been because she knew more about the buildings than he did.

It was mostly just her talking and Spencer asking her questions, and Penelope and Derek rolling behind them and grinning like a couple of idiots at their supposedly perfect matchmaking skills.

Darcy was about to agree with them when Penelope mentioned that the massages were going to start, did Darcy and Spencer want to go together, and Spencer made about a zillion excuses before leaving abruptly.

Darcy was left blinking in his wake as she tried to figure out exactly what had happened. “Oh, wait…” she said suddenly, about halfway through a self-loathing spiral. “He’s the one who doesn’t like getting touched, isn’t he?”

“He doesn’t like being touched by people outside of his very small circle of people.”

“So he’s never gotten a massage?” Darcy asked, directing the question to Derek, who shrugged in a rather animated sort of way. “Is he just a tight ass or what?”

“Believe me, I wouldn’t know,” Penelope laughed. “Why don’t you go after him?”

“So I don’t get a massage now?” Darcy asked, whining a little, but she still smirked because yeah, she was going to go find him.

“I’ll send a masseur up to your room tomorrow night, now _go_.” Penelope pushed her in the direction Spencer had taken. Darcy continued down the street and turned where he had before she lost her bearings. She was pulling out her phone for a GPS walking directions back to the hotel when she heard her name.

“Darcy!”

She turned and locked eyes with Spencer, who was sitting outside an open-air cafe.

Smiling, she stopped. “So like, can I join you, or…”

“As long as you’re not trying to rub my ass, I think it should be fine,” he deadpanned.

She grinned and took the seat across from him that he offered.

“I ordered wine… it’s early but…”

“But it’s a vacation?” she said, smiling as the server came up to the table. A cute girl with pink hair and bubblegum that she was popping.

Darcy grinned as she greeted them. “Yeah, can I have a mimosa?”

“Yes ma’am,” the girl said, turning to leave.

She turned back to Spencer. “Now we’ll see if early champagne affects me as much as late champagne does.”

He smiled and sipped at the glass of wine that had been brought him.

It was a brunch place, so they ended up getting a plate of mini chocolate croissants and talking until the place started serving lunch.

Spencer was a great conversationalist, which boded well for him in the future since talking was all that Darcy was going to be up for. For at least a while, anyway.

She still hadn’t sussed out if Penelope had let on to Spencer about Darcy’s orientation or not, but she had time. He didn’t seem to be trying to rush towards any clear motive. I.e, the bedroom. So it wasn’t all that urgent.

Penelope called her around the time the cafe had switched to a lunch menu and asked if they wanted to go out for lunch with them, and of course, they said yes. It was hard to deny the bride-to-be anything. Especially when she was as far from bridezilla as she could be.

Spencer had already paid the bill before she could get off the phone and she smirked at him in reply. “Thank you. But I’m buying lunch now.”

He tilted his head and started to protest, but she simply cited his rushed payment as a precedent setter and he argued with her about that as they walked back to the hotel to join Derek and Penelope in the hotel bar.

By the time they got there, there was already a large group of people seated at the table. Some of them, Darcy already knew. JJ and Emily were familiar faces, while Hotch certainly wasn’t. Rossi was familiar to her only because she’d read every single one of his true crime books and maybe went to a few of his book signings as well.

Penelope linked arms with her, tugging her over between her and Spencer. “Okay, so everyone sit where you want!” She held fast to Darcy. “Not you,” she hissed. “Sit here.”

She practically shoved Darcy into a seat beside her and then tugged Spencer into the seat on the other side of Darcy.

She didn’t really have to tug him, he was already headed there.

Darcy grinned. “Wow. Fancy seeing you here.”

Spencer laughed. “Right, it’s almost as if someone was forcing us together. Because we can’t be trusted to do it ourselves.”

“You guys can sit over there and snark all you want. All you’re doing is proving me right,” Penelope said haughtily and Emily laughed. “If I could smash your faces together and make you kiss like I used to do with my Barbies, then you’d already be there.”

“Just Barbies?” Emily asked.

Penelope sniffed. “I had to, I didn’t have any Kens.”

“Okay, sorry, but I’m still stuck on the smashing our faces together,” Spencer interjected.

“Well, you see, Spence…” JJ began. “When two people…” And she trailed off, laughing.

“No, go on. How does that end, JJ?” He was laughing and spreading his napkin on his lap.

“Yeah, I’m interested as well,” Darcy said. “When two people… buy a boat together?”

“It depends on the kind of boat,” Spencer interjected.

“Oh, it’s definitely one of those paddleboats that looks like a swan,” Darcy replied without missing a beat. “When they buy one of those, what happens, JJ?”

JJ smirked at both of them, spreading out her own napkin. “When they buy a swan-shaped paddleboat, they paddle it into the middle of a lake and go for a swim,” she said with a false brightness that only made Darcy giggle a little bit more.

That seemed to end the teasing, so Darcy leaned over closer to Spencer to whisper, “I’m fine with not smashing our faces together. No Presh.”

“Presh?”

“Pressure,” she replied.

“I only ask because I’ve also heard it used to shorten precious. But that didn’t work with the context clues.”

She nodded and took a sip from her water glass.

“And I have no problem with the face smashing. As long as it’s… consensual?” he said, trailing off. “Sorry, that made no sense. I don’t want to smash my face into yours. I mean… not like that. I’d like a mutual smash.”

“A mutual smash? Is that what the kids are calling it?” she asked.

“I have no idea,” he said, laughing a little. “But thank you for that… decompression.”

“If you have anything else you’d like me to compress, just say the word.”

He nearly choked on his water and Darcy grinned. “I’m kidding. I don’t compress the first day I meet someone.”

“That’s… interesting to note.”

She wasn’t sure what that meant, but the server was there and taking their orders, so she couldn’t get him to elaborate.

Darcy wasn’t really hungry, and she could tell Spencer wasn’t either.

“Would you like to split something?” he asked, leaning over and using the menu to hide behind.

She hid behind hers as well. “Thought you had a weird thing about touching.”

“I figured we wouldn’t both have our hands in it at the same time,” he deadpanned.

Darcy snorted. “So no spaghetti, then.”

“I was thinking…” he trailed off. “Something we could cut in half?”

“They have a turkey club?”

“Turkey club it is,” he said, putting the menus down.

“But get extra fries,” she said. “I get snacky.”

She could feel him looking at her, but she didn’t want to keep looking at him because everyone was sort of watching them out of the corner of their eyes. It was like going on a date with your entire family who liked your date and wanted it to work out, so they kept doing things that would set the mood, but they were doing all of them too much, so it was just weird.

When the server got to them, Darcy ordered a plate of fries, and Spencer ordered the turkey club.

“I almost want to get it to go,” he said, leaning in towards her.

“Awww, and ruin their entertainment?”

“They’re all trying so hard not to look at us, it feels like we should be trying to get them to.”

“Like what?”

“Like, I should feed you the sandwich.”

“And do the Lady and the Tramp thing with a really long fry,” she said, smirking. “Kidding.”

The food came and they drew a few looks when she ate off his plate. Well. He did, mostly but it didn’t seem to phase him at all.

As the meal began to wind down, everyone started making plans to go out to a night club, but Darcy had to beg out.

If she wasn’t mistaken, Spencer almost looked more disappointed than Penelope did. But, Darcy was tired, and she had a pair of silk PJs and Hulu calling her name.

She also had plans to order room service at some point. Call her lame, but she really liked ordering food and having it delivered.

So, she said her goodbyes and went up to her room.

Darcy started out taking a shower and then once that was finished, she changed into her PJs and lay down in the middle of her big cozy bed to start yet another rewatch of Bones. She had left the adjoining door to hers and Spencer’s room unlocked, and from the sounds of things, he had his unlocked as well, because she could hear him moving around in there. He’d apparently not gone out with everyone else either.

She entertained knocking and asking him to join her, but decided against it. With him being a behavioral analyst for the FBI, he’d probably not want to watch a crime show with so many inconsistencies in it.

Plus, according to the itinerary that Penelope sent her sometime that day, there were mandatory dance lessons for everyone in the wedding party. And Darcy was the maid of honor. Spencer was the best man, so they’d probably both be there. She’d see him then. Plus, she didn’t want him to get the wrong idea about her.

After about three episodes into her rewatch, her stomach growled. It was about an hour after it grew dark outside, so enough time had passed since her teeny lunch, so she called down to order room service. She ordered a bacon cheeseburger and a side salad, since she’d already had fries that day, and was promised to have it delivered in thirty minutes.

So she sat back and continued watching her show.

Of course, thirty minutes came and went, and no food showed up.

She was about to call downstairs about it when there was a knock on the door. But not the one leading into the hall. The one leading into Spencer’s room.

She went to open it and burst out laughing when she saw him there holding the tray and attempting his best hotel waiter look by balancing it on one hand. “I told them my name was on the door.”

“They still brought it here…” He smirked and handed her the tray and she took it in both hands so she didn’t flip it onto the carpet or something equally as embarrassing.

“Sorry about that,” she said, setting it down on the desk.

“It’s no trouble,” he said, reaching up to rub the back of his neck. “So um… what are you watching? I can hear the theme song every so often…”

“Bones,” she said. “It’s a crime comedy-drama about forensic anthropology.”

“I’ve heard of it,” he said, laughing. “It’s not--”

“In any way accurate? Not a chance, and I don’t even know anything about that field, but I can just tell by looking at it that it’s not.”

He laughed again and looked down at his shoes, which he was still wearing. “So, I umm. I had a good time today. With you. You’re really… fun to be around, Darcy.”

“Right back atcha, Spencer.”

“Are you going to the dance lessons tomorrow?”

“Pen said it was mandatory.”

“I know, but I thought we could skip it and go on another tour so you can one-up the guide for the entire thing.”

She laughed. “As fun as that sounds… I really think Penelope wants us to learn to dance.”

He made a face. “Yeah, I suppose. Have you ever danced before?”

“Who said you’re going to be my partner?” Darcy asked, laughing. “I could be dancing with Rossi.”

He laughed. “You’d have more fun. He’s a good dancer.”

“I doubt it. Although, I have read all his books, so I mean.”

“Oh, you’re a fan?”

“Yeah, a little bit of one. I might have met him years ago when he did a book signing in the book store where I worked. But I know he doesn’t remember me.”

“He might. He never forgets a pretty face. Or so he says.”

She blushed. “So I have a pretty face?”

He gave her an incredulous look. “Yes, and you don’t need me to tell you. Right?”

“Right, I’m just teasing you.”

He swallowed thickly. “So what channel is Bones on? Maybe I’ll watch it with you.”

He could have asked to come into her room and watch, but he didn’t, so Darcy took her queue from him. “It’s on Hulu. There’s a sign-in option on the main menu of the TV.”

“Perfect. Which episode are you on?”

“I just restarted it, so I’m about to start episode 4.”

He took a step back, his hand on the door on his side. “Want to just keep these open?”

“Only if you want my running commentary.”

“I do,” he said, laughing as they both went back to their beds. Darcy took her food with her and Spencer queued his up with hers and they were within milliseconds of each other when they started watching.

* * *

Darcy fell asleep with the door to her room open, but woke up to it closed, which meant Spencer must have closed it during the night. It made her smile.

He was a good guy. She hated to give in to Penelope’s matchmaking because if it worked, she’d never hear the end of it. But Spencer was a really great guy.

He was her type, good-looking, skinny, gangly, muppety. Penelope had her number all right.

Now he only had to stand up to the test of time. Or waiting, as it were.

Because she sometimes took forever to figure out if she had a crush on someone or not.

Darcy took another shower, being careful to keep her hair from getting wet because the curls were set beautifully from the night before.

She got dressed in comfortable clothing, as per Penelope’s email, and went to her phone to try to find somewhere to procure a light breakfast. Preferably something caffeinated with far too much sugar.

There was a coffee shop on the corner and so she made her way down there.

She spotted the back of his head as he was ordering and couldn’t’ help but smile. Of course, they’d end up at the same coffee shop.

He was dressed largely in the same manner as he had been the day before. Grey slacks and a tailored button-down. Not comfortable clothing like Penelope had instructed, but Darcy figured that he wasn’t the type to dress down for many reasons.

She herself had on a pair of yoga leggings that made her ass look amazing and an oversized crop top that she’d made out of an old sweatshirt. She’d piled her curls into a messy bun, complete with a scrunchie to keep from crimping the curls.

He must have sensed her standing there because he turned and smiled when he saw her. “Hey, Darcy.”

“Hey Spencer,” she said, grinning. “Thanks for closing the door last night.”

“Oh, right. Yeah, you must have been tired, because I was talking to you and then you were sort of… asleep,” he said, laughing. “Or it could have been my boring explanations for every single thing in that show.”

“Hush you,” she said. “I adore your explanations.”

“Can I take your order?” the barista asked.

“Oh, yes… can I get the mint chocolate chip mocha frappuccino? And could you like, put extra whip on that? And an extra shot of espresso?”

“Absolutely.” The barista rang it up and Darcy stepped aside for the next person, going to stand with Spencer down at the end of the counter to wait for her drink.

“So we are definitely going to the dance lessons?” he asked. “Last chance to ditch.”

She smirked. “Any other time, I would love to do anything else. But we owe it to Penelope…”

“I guess so…” he said. They gave him his coffee after that, and he waited alongside her until they handed over her drink.

They left the shop together.

“So, apparently there’s like a dance studio nearby, and we’re all getting a two-hour lesson there… is that what you’re wearing? Pen said to dress comfortably.”

“This is me dressing comfortably,” Spencer replied.

Darcy grinned and started walking, sipping at her drink while he fell in beside her.

She pulled up directions on her phone and they were able to walk there in about fifteen minutes.

Penelope and Derek were already there. As were Aaron and JJ. Rossi and Emily both arrived a few minutes later and had sunglasses on, likely to counteract the hangovers they apparently had.

“And that is precisely the reason I didn’t go out last night,” Darcy muttered.

Spencer laughed and Emily winced.

“Okay, everyone pair up,” Penelope said, placing her hands on everyone’s shoulders and ushering them into pairs. JJ with Aaron, Emily with Rossi, and when she got to Darcy and Spencer, she grinned. “Look how that worked out.”

Darcy gave her a snotty smile and deadpanned, “Yeah, I know. Crazy. Although, I’m not sure how this is going to work if my partner doesn’t like the touchy.” She shrugged.

“Oh, I don’t mind dancing with you,” Spencer said, holding out his hand. “I mean… if you want to, that is. If you wanted Hungover Rossi, then don’t let me stand in the way.”

Darcy smirked and took his hand, reveling at the knowledge that not many people knew that he had calluses on his fingertips.

The first dance was merengue, which felt like old people dancing. Of course, she’d taken Social Dance at Culver, so she was able to keep up. The big surprise was Spencer. He not only mastered the steps immediately, he even put a little flair into it, leading her into a sideways hold before the instructor had even demonstrated it.

“Whoa… was no one going to tell me this dork had moves or was I supposed to find that out all by myself?” She grinned and he spun her back to face him. “Dork (affectionately), of course.”

He chuckled. “I might have taken some lessons before coming here. I didn’t want to make a fool of myself…”

“That is totally valid,” Darcy said. “I would have done the same if I hadn’t taken a few classes in college.”

“Speaking of college,” he said, watching as the instructor executed a single turn. He squeezed Darcy’s waist and she went into a spin, stopping again in front of him. He held her a little closer after that. “Where did you go?”

“Culver,” she said with a shrug. “Couldn’t really afford it, but what can ya do?” She chuckled. “That’s what student loans are for.”

“Culver’s a nice establishment. I considered going there when I was thinking about possible careers. Microbiology was one in my maybe pile.”

“It’s got a good microbiology department for sure. Got a good nuclear physics department too.”

“Yeah, if you want to get turned into a mutant with green skin.”

“Hey, I happen to know that guy, and he’s not a mutant,” she said, sniffing. “He’s got no X-Gene at all, actually. He’s just two people in one body.”

“Wait… Dr. Bruce Banner? You know Dr. Bruce Banner?” Spencer asked. “Why didn’t Penelope tell me that?”

“Because I never lead with who I know. Because it makes people act like completely different people. People who want to get into my pants as a way to gather contacts. Like, I’m sorry. But my pants contain more than contacts. At least… when my phone isn’t in my pocket.”

Spencer smiled and looked down for a minute. “Would help you to say that I’m not interested in either?”

Her eyebrows went up.

“I mean… I might be interested in one… one day. Some day. But right now, I’m still getting to know you… I just… I’m really bad at explaining it?”

Darcy smiled, chuckling a little. “They have a word for that, you know?”

“A word for what? Someone who can’t spit out the point? Yeah, I’m aware.”

“No, I mean. A word for someone who doesn’t experience sexual attraction until they get to know someone.”

“Oh, demisexual? Yes. I knew that. I just… when I say it, people mishear me, or think that means I’m only into one night stands, which—“

“Couldn’t be further from the truth. I know!” Darcy laughed. “Try explaining it to everyone you date in college, and who thinks they deserve sex because they bought you Chick fil A between classes with their lunch package.”

Spencer laughed and looked down again. He really was cute.

Like aesthetically adorable. He really had a great smile.

“I like your smile,” she said. “It’s aesthetically adorable.”

That just made him blush even more. “Thanks. I like yours too. Not to be rude, but you’ve got that gap in your teeth and it’s really…”

“Aesthetically adorable?”

“Yeah.”

It was easier to get into the steps after that.

And Darcy had to hand it to Penelope. She really did have her number. This guy was… Aces.

Ace of hearts for sure.

Well, Demi of hearts, technically.

* * *

The day of the wedding was hectic. Darcy didn’t really catch more than a glimpse of Spencer the entire day. He was too busy with Derek. And Likewise, she was too busy with Penelope.

It started that morning when she and the other bridesmaids had appointments to get their hair done.

They all got these glorious beach waves that were easier for Darcy than for either Emily or JJ, who had stick straight hair, but they still looked amazing.

Penelope’s was up, but that was to be expected with the dress she’d chosen. It was a hot pink number with a flowy skirt that somehow ombre’d to sheer towards the bottom so it showed off her legs. It also had an open back and this gorgeous corset closure up her lower back.

In a word, she looked beautiful. Very Penelope. And very beautiful.

She had the bridesmaids in white to offset her dress. And also because it was like a hundred degrees. Theirs were very light linen with big skirts and low shoulders. It meant Darcy had to wear a bustier to keep the ladies under control, but the dress was actually very flattering.

With the beach waves, she looked like she belonged there on the sand.

The ceremony itself was on the beach at sundown, so the sand wasn’t so piping hot on their bare feet. Because yeah. They were barefoot.

Penelope had these four-inch heels that she really wanted to wear, so in place of throwing flower petals, her flower girls were unrolling this carpet in front of her to walk on. It was all very extra and very Penelope.

But the kids were like seven? And it took them at least an hour to get the carpet thing right at the rehearsal, even with everyone cheering them on, so Darcy was hoping it went down without a hitch today.

They’d had the rehearsal the night before, and that’s when she found out that she was walking out with Spencer.

Which, she sort of assumed. But it was nice to know for sure. He was even taller when she didn’t have shoes on. But he was very helpful when her feet slid in the sand so that she didn’t fall on her ass while walking up the makeshift aisle.

After hair, it was time for nails and makeup. And girl talk.

JJ and Emily were trying to talk to Pen about the wedding, but she sniffed and shook her head. “Look, with me and Derek getting married, we already know this is gonna be the most lit thing any of you will ever attend in your lives. What I want to hear about is Spencer.” Penelope waggled her eyebrows at Darcy. “Whatdya think?”

“He’s…” Darcy began, aware that they were all waiting with bated breath for her next words. “Calm down, he’s wonderful.”

They all sighed with relief.

“Yeah, it’s really great because like… he understands my whole…” she gestured around. “Thing. With dating.”

Penelope smiling knowingly. “I told you that you’d be perfect together.”

“Spencer’s such a nice guy,” Emily gushed.

JJ nodded. “He is, he’s really slow at some things, but--“

“Again, relax. We talked about how we’re both… similar.”

JJ and Emily frowned for only a split second before nodding quickly in understanding. “I didn’t know you were—“ Emily began.

“No, I just thought you were… into your studies. And then your career…”

“Nah, I’m just… slow…”

“But it’s okay because didn’t I tell you that the right guy wouldn’t mind waiting for you?” Penelope said, applying her fake eyelashes. “Now come here, and let me get your eyelashes on …”

*** * ***

The sun going down in the west made for a very smart move on Pen and Derek’s part to have the wedding in the evening. It was delightfully orange and warm. There were torches everywhere to illuminate everyone.

The bridesmaids walked down when the sun was just a sliver on the skyline.

Darcy and Spencer walked down next, taking it a bit slower since they were slightly more important than the previous ones. But also because Darcy wasn’t great at walking in sand, so it looked a bit like Spencer was helping someone learn how to walk right then on their descent down the aisle. Luckily, standing wasn’t that big of a deal for her, but it was super sweet of Spencer to walk her over to her spot before walking to his, a huge grin on his face as he did it.

She grinned as well.

And then…

Penelope.

Who looked like a neon angel. Who looked so goddamn beautiful, Darcy was pretty sure she saw tears glistening in Derek’s eyes.

Dude, even she was crying, watching her wonderful friend walk down the aisle to her soulmate, an equally wonderful human being.

* * *

The ceremony was beautiful. Darcy had to hold back tears so she wouldn’t cry and ruin her mascara.

And then afterward, it was the reception, where the dancing happened. Thankfully on a floor, because dancing in the sand would probably be worse than walking in it for sure.

Spencer pretty much carried her along, because he was decidedly less rusty than she was, but she was laughing so much, the steps were all wrong anyway.

It was a good thing no one had on shoes. Because she would have busted up his feet with heels if she’d been wearing them.

They went back to their places at the head table, sort of collapsing into their seats while they watched Penelope and Derek embrace. Pen pulled him down for a kiss and Darcy looked away. It wasn’t that she didn’t like kissing, but she didn’t like gawking at it.

Spencer apparently felt the same way, because when she turned back to him, she caught him looking at her.

Intently.

She smiled because it felt warm under his gaze and she sort of liked it.

“So, I don’t know anything for certain, but I like you a lot. Even if this doesn’t work out romantically, I’d like to see you again,” he said bluntly. “I’m in DC most of the time, but I travel a lot.”

“I split my time between DC and NYC,” she said.

“I live with my mother,” he said. “She has dementia, so she’s living with me. There’s a nurse as well. It’s… I know I said she was in assisted living. And she is. In my apartment.“

Darcy reached out for his hand, squeezing. “It’s wonderful. You’re a wonderful son, Spencer. You’d have to be to do that for your mom.”

He smiled and looked down at their hands.

“Oh, sorry… it’s a reflex… I’m very tactile…” She started to move it, but he pulled it back.

“It’s fine right where it is,” he said. “Despite my dislike of physical touch, I can tend on the tactile side of things as well. Provided I’m comfortable.”

“I mean, touching something, or someone, is a legitimate form of scientific inquiry,” Darcy said. “But on the softer side of things, it’s also just nice. Jumpstarts the dopamine and serotonin. Cuddling can help depression.”

Spencer pressed his lips together and nodded. “I’ve heard that, actually. Never really tested it myself, but…”

“I have dogs,” she said with a smile. “And they’re very cuddly.”

“Dogs? How many?”

“Just the two,” she said, smiling. “I’m actually surprised I haven’t brought out my pictures to show you…”

“Do they travel with you? Between New York and DC?”

She nodded. “Yep. They do. They come with me everywhere. Built-in cuddle factories, both of them. So like… if you ever need something like that and this doesn’t… you know work out. I’d be willing to share.”

She pulled out her phone to show him pictures of both of her doggos. “The big one’s Cordelia, and the other one’s Agnes. They look fierce, but they are the biggest teddy bears.”

“I’d like that,” he said, scooting a little closer. “To meet them, I mean.”

She smiled and put her phone down. “I’m really happy I met you.”

“Me too. Same… about you.” He squeezed her hand just as a slow song started playing. “Do you feel like dancing?”

“Not really… I feel like walking… how about you?”

Spencer smiled. “I don’t feel like dancing either… walking though, that could be fun… and you could tell me more about Agnes and Cordelia.”

“I would _love_ that,” Darcy said, taking his hand when he offered it. He offered it differently than he usually did, and it didn’t escape her notice. He had his fingers spread, so she fit hers in between them before clasping tightly. He smiled as they walked out of the tent and onto the dark beach.

If nothing else came of this weekend, let it be known, Penelope Garcia-Morgan was an absolute genius.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave me some sugar if you liked it! <3


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